Neil...

My friend, Neil, is hilarious and he could be a bass god if only he practiced. He will get there when he gets more time, I'm sure.

Anyway this is what he said about me the other while chatting on msn. Funny shit.

Neil says:
I figured it out, man
Neil says:
You gots the perfect fucking combo going on
Neil says:
You gots the guitar hero thing happening...I mean, what girl doesn't cream her panties over guitar players?
Neil says:
Then, you gots the 'tough guy' thing happening, what with knocking out coffee-throwing teens and money-demanding crackheads
Neil says:
THEN
Neil says:
Number three
Neil says:
You appeal to their nurturing side - which all women, with the exception of actual female psychopaths, have in spades - because you were born minus a leg
Neil says:
You lucky fucker
Neil says:
It's the perfect storm of pussy attracting
Neil says:
You cock